Originally the title of a rather annoying song by Newworldson (who happen to have one of the most annoying band names out), the title has been redeemed and superbly so by Imagine Dragons. This would have to be one of my favorite songs out at the moment! This band is just too darn good!
My life was pretty much complete when I discovered that to my surprise Imagine Dragons had released a lot more songs on their extended editions of Night Visions than the standard 11-track album I had. Even though for an 11-track the percentage of awesome music on there is incredibly high! So it was to Youtube for me where I spent the next hour and a half in complete contentment. Then I remembered I had 3 assignments to write and that brought me down to earth pretty quick.
So far this weekend has involved me working pretty much to the death on these three stupid essays. Well maybe not that hard. Actually more like not hard enough. But the amount of effort I've gone into reading up, thinking and worrying about them has been almost equal or probably more so than the amount of actual writing I've done. So all up I feel like I've invested a lot of time into them.
And not going to lie, it's been wearing me down.
It's not that I can't write, it's just that at the moment I lack the motivation to. Every step I take I keep asking myself the same old question. Why am I doing this again?! Do I really want another three years of study? Do I even want to be a journalist? Heck I'm not even sure if I'll get a job out of this!
I guess the best thing to do in times like this is what I've always done: Keep at it. Just try your best and rely on your determination to see you through. Which I am capable in every single way of doing. It's just that it's getting me down. All this self-doubt, this uncertainty. This constant worry that was not what I expected of this year. That maybe I'm doing something wrong.
Yet everything's worked out for me to be here.
And I can't help but think that this is where I'm meant to be.
I'm just not sure what for, that's all.
This is my heart, it's on the line.
1 comment:
When you were six you wanted to be a writer. When Beka was eight she wanted to be a designer. There were times when the rigour of study almost quenched to love of design in her, and there will be times when it threatens to stifle the love of writing in you. But persevere, for it will teach you disciplines that you will not even know you are applying, and talent like yours deserves the chance to be honed into something amazing. Don't worry about a job, a job will find you. Be encouraged!
xoMum
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